The FFVII: Advent Children Drinking Game!

So I’m sitting around today watching Final Fantasy VII – Advent Children for about the millionth time. It’s quite a good good movie. Beautiful CGI, wonderful music, decent voice acting. I’m not blind, however, the occasional cliche and strange little scene that crops up in the movie. Being bored, I’ve decided to build a drinking game around it!

Ladies and gentlemen, in my most pointless post ever, welcome to the Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children Drinking Game! The rules are simple: any time any of the events listed happens, you take a drink! Let’s begin.

1. A close up shot of someone putting on a glove, take a drink.
2. Cloud mopes, take a drink.
3. Someone you’re watching the movie with says they want to shag Cloud, take a drink.
4. You find a specific scene confusing, despite repeated viewings of the film, take a drink.
5. The Turks do something stupid/pointless/confusing, take a drink.
6. Someone you’re watching the movie with says they want to shag Tifa, take a drink.
7. Someone shouts someone else’s name (ie: “Tifa!”, “Cloud!”, “Kanaeda!”, “Tetsuo!”), take a drink.
8. If they shout it while they’re trying to sneak up on the person in question, take two drinks.
9. One of the bad guys mocks one of the other bad guys for crying, take a drink.
10. Deus ex machina happens, take a drink.
11. Someone you’re watching the movie with says they want to shag Cait Sith, take two drinks, then get them some therapy.
12. Cloud broods, take a drink.
13. The Laws of Physics are violated in a particularly egregious fashion (even for a super-hero/anime film), take a drink.
14. One of the bad guys whines about “Mother”, take a drink.
15. Cloud pouts, take a drink.
16. We see yet another version of the shot of Sephiroth standing among the flames, take a drink.
17. A scene in the movie is a direct reproduction of one of the cut-scenes from the game, take a drink.
18. Cloud frowns, take a drink.
19. Someone gets their sunglasses broken/knocked off, take a drink.
20. Someone strikes a “cool” pose for no reason other than to look “cool”, take a drink.
21. Cloud smiles, get plastered!

Ok, so it’s imperfect and silly. But so is the movie. It’s also fun. So is the movie.