Back on April 1, 2010, I posted up an article claiming that the Pope was going to resign. I also said that Superman was being sold to Marvel, but none of you bought that last part. Turns out I was accurate about the first claim, though I was a few years off.
Yes, Benny 16, aka Pope Palpatine, aka Pope Gollum, that ghoulish figure who used to run the modern day version of the Inquisition (no, really), has announced that he’s stepping down from his little throne. He’s the first pope to do so since 1415.
I have a few things to say about this. First off, good. The church needs someone who has at least a 20th century view of the world and not an 18th century one. They need someone with at least something close to a modern view of the world, and that’s something Benny 16 severely lacks.
Second, now that he’s going to be stepping down, can we stop pretending that he’s a world leader and arrest his ass? He’s directly responsible for helping to cover up the rapes of many, many children by no small number of priests. At the very least he’s got information that he needs to be sharing. At the very worst, he’s an accessory.
Third, while we’re on this note, can we please stop pretending the Vatican is its own country? Mussolini allowed them to be in return for the Catholic church supporting him. Mussolini. There’s the problem right there. Sure, they have a treaty saying they’re independent and all that, but that doesn’t mean we have to play along. We don’t recognize the existence of Taiwan as a country, and they sure as hell have a better claim to nationhood than the freaking Vatican.
All in all, I really hope the next pope is better than this piece of human garbage for whom I have absolutely zero respect. Also, I really hope the next pope picks the name Lando II, because awesome.